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Wanna be a winning dad? There’s now a manual for that, thanks to Symon Jarowyj. It didn’t take long for Symon Jarowyj to realise he didn’t feature high on his daughter’s popularity list. Despite being primary nappy changer during the first six weeks of Neko’s life during his partner Natalie’s recovery from a caesarean, the Grace Emily pub part-owner soon learnt that when it comes to a kid’s priorities, it’s 1) mum, and then 2) everyone else. “When Neko was about two I started realising that whenever my mum or mother-in-law would come over, she’d show a lot more excitement than when I came home from work,” Symon explains. “I was getting a bit jealous and thinking, I’m not even in the top two in popularity anymore! So I started jotting down ideas of ways I could make things around the house more fun for her so she’d think I was a bit less boring. Like if I was doing the washing, I’d be smelling every item of clothing as she passed it to me and saying ‘pooo!’ to her in a really high voice and pulling a funny face or whatever, just to get a giggle.” As Symon’s list grew, chats with punters over the bar revealed more stark lessons all dads must learn in their little ones’ first years of life. The way your car requires a transformation into a fully-equipped baby supply vehicle. How daunting it is to wrap a baby for the first time when bringing them home from hospital. The fact that baby poo, at least initially, isn’t even that bad relative to its reputation. “I started thinking all these things would actually make a pretty funny little book,” Symon says. “Something for other dads to have so they can prepare for what’s coming, you know?” Symon talked the idea through with pub regular and mate, Josh Fanning – publisher of quarterly Adelaide magazine, CityMag – and he was soon onboard. “I liked the idea of a manual that was illustrated to look like an airport emergency landing card – something small and tongue-in-cheek, but something half-serious that identified those areas for dads on how they could do a better job,” Symon says. “Every dad book on the market tends to be 150-plus pages and it’s all good info, but I guess the majority of dads probably don’t really have the attention span. I just wanted something short and sharp that got dads thinking about how you can help out at home and the little things you need to do like cleaning the nest. I never knew about that stuff until my partner told me – like, ‘See this dust? I want it gone’. And you realise that if you clean the nest without your partner asking you, you’re gonna impress them, and she’s gonna think you’re up for the challenge and on the same page as her.” The final piece of the puzzle came last year when Josh introduced Symon to Adelaide illustrator Owen Lindsay, and The Winning Dad Manual was born. “I’d sort of give him an idea of what I wanted, but then Owen’s very clever at adding his own little jokes,” Symon says. “And because he doesn’t have kids he’s very good at giving that single man perspective. He did a cracking job.” Despite the book being a neat 51 pages and relatively light on text, The Winning Dad Manual manages to cram advice to cover all the important periods, from pre-game nerves, to infancy and to toddling. Perhaps more impressively though, it delivers really practical advice with a remarkable strike-rate of genuine lols (the diagrams of a child’s developing brain, for example, are on-point). While Symon doesn’t envisage too many men buying the book for themselves, he instead sees it as the perfect gift for any soon-to-be dad before they’re about to embark on their new adventure. And with daughter Neko having just turned four (and with another baby on the way), he’s clearly an authority on the perilous 0-3 age bracket. Now he’s just got to master the next three years. “We’re gonna do another one for ages three-to-six, so every three years there’ll be an updated manual,” Symon says. The Winning Dad Manual ($10.95) will initially be available at Imprints, Vintage Carousel, Streetlight Adelaide, Eccola and via online shop thewinningdadmanual.com Keep up-to-date with availability and stockists via Instagram @thewinningdadmanual    Images by Meaghan Coles Now and Then Photography

Homemade Sausage Rolls and Tomato Sauce Recipe and images by Annabel Bower Makes 72 1 onion, finely chopped or grated 1/2 sweet potato (300g), grated 1 apple, grated 1 zucchini, grated 1 carrot, grated 1/4 cauliflower, grated or 1 broccoli stalk, grated 1 clove of garlic, crushed 1 tsp cumin, ground (optional) 500g lean beef/ lamb/ pork mince 800g – 1kg sausage mince (from butcher) 6 sheets of shop bought puff pastry 1 egg, separated 1 tbsp sesame seeds Squeeze the excess liquid out of the grated apple, sweet potato and zucchini. Mix with onion, garlic, carrot, cauliflower/broccoli and cumin. Add the 2 minces. Mix thoroughly with your hands. Lay out your 6 sheets of pastry. Cut a centre line down each sheet of pastry to create 2 rectangles (12×24 cm). You will now have 12 pieces of pastry to work with. Brush this centre cut with egg white. Divide the meat + veg mix evenly in neat lines down the centre of your 12 rectangles. Roll the empty pastry over the meat mix tucking the outside edge underneath the edge painted with egg white. Cut each “log” into 6 bite size sausage rolls. Brush the tops with egg yolk and sprinkle with sesame seeds. Bake till crispy and golden at 200 degrees for 20-25 minutes. Make sure the bases aren’t soggy! Can be cooked and then frozen if you’re making them in advance. Homemade Tomato Sauce 1 cup passata 1 apple, peeled and grated 1 tbsp red wine vinegar 2 garlic cloves, crushed 1 tsp Dijon mustard 1 tsp mild paprika Combine all ingredients and simmer for ten minutes. Stir the sides occasionally so that the sauce does not catch and burn. Allow to cool before blending with a stick blender or in a food processor. 
This will keep for up to one week in the fridge. Annabel Bower graduated from the world renowned Ballymaloe Cookery School in Ireland seventeen years ago. Annabel has since worked in events and catering and her present focus is on recipe development and food styling. As a mum of three and a passionate foodie Annabel spends most of her time in the kitchen! Her favourite people to cook for are friends and family and even though like all children her kids won’t eat everything she cooks, she is determined to keep trying and happily share a few of her failsafe, crowd-pleasing recipes with you! For more family friendly recipes follow @foodbyannabel

Keeping kids’ bedrooms or playrooms looking organised and styled is a much easier task if you incorporate functional, fun and stylish storage solutions. Here are Edited Interiors top organisation tips: Categorise toys and group like with like so they are easier to find and easier to put away. Use decorative baskets that tie into the existing styling of the room. Create a bench seat with room for storage underneath. (The Ikea Kallax cube storage is perfect for this). A decorative pillow on top creates extra seating and adds some colour and style the storage cubes underneath with decorative baskets or books. Felt pinboards are a great way to add a pop of colour to the room and are perfect for displaying treasured artworks, notes and photos. Make the most of the space underneath the bed and use trundle storage drawers. Trundle drawers make for a great LEGO storage zone. Add a kid’s dustpan to the drawer to help make the chore of packing up the LEGO at the end of the day more fun for your little one. If budget allows, consider built-in book cases and desks. Use book shelves to display your child’s favourite books. Add a bean bag or floor pillows underneath to create a reading nook or corner. If you have open shelving use baskets and boxes to keep things looking tidy. Make sure you are using the space within your children’s wardrobes effectively. Give the wardrobes an edit and voila: extra space for toys can usually be found. Label boxes and bins so the kids can easily find things and put them away. For more information on styling, and home organisation check out: editedinteriors.com.au @editedinteriors

Thoroughly Modern Mama When Lindy Klim started modelling in the late nineties – her lithe long limbs and exotic looks capturing the essence of modern Australia – she breezily mentioned in one of her very first interviews that she wanted to be a mother. “I want a big, huge family – I want four kids!” she recalls, laughing. Fast forward twenty years and Lindy is not only a mum of four, she is an accomplished businesswoman, fashion designer and the embodiment of modern parenthood. After a highly publicised marriage breakdown to Olympic swimmer Michael Klim, Lindy is happier than she has been in a long time. Together with new partner, property developer Adam Ellis, they welcomed a little girl, Goldie, into the world eight months ago. The newest addition to the Bali-based brood completes the family of photogenic siblings that include Stella, 12, Rocco, 10 and Frankie, 7. Funny and disarmingly honest, Lindy speaks of a very real and relatable kind of family life: the juggle of managing multiple after school activities, navigating a new journey into joint custody arrangements and becoming a blended family. Initially fearful of how it might all work bringing a new baby into the family unit, her fears were allayed the moment Goldie arrived. “Frankie in particular, is ‘obsessed’ with Goldie…but what’s nice is that there’s 3 kids that are the Klim’s, and now we’ve got Goldie and it’s just made our family closer and that’s really lovely,” she says. On being a blended family, Lindy explains they don’t talk about half-siblings, they’re simply brothers and sisters: “…we never say it, we never sort of mention it – sometimes there’s confusion over last names, but we’ll just manage that and get through it,” she says. With Stella approaching her teens, Lindy is parenting at both ends of the spectrum, changing nappies one minute and chaperoning her eldest daughter on her very first date the next. Having Adam step in and take on the role as stepdad has only strengthened their family bond. “Stella’s relationship with Adam is incredible. She’ll often text or call him before me, which is great as I know that sometimes I’m not always the best person to talk to.” she says. While becoming a mother again at 40 is physically more demanding than the first time around, the experience of already being a mother has certainly had its advantages. “When it’s your first, it can be so daunting and terrifying and you just don’t know what to expect. I think it’s been nice for Adam to see how my experience in having three other children before Goldie has made me so relaxed that it’s made it such a nice journey for the both of us.” It certainly hasn’t slowed her down either, with several projects in the pipeline, including her own burgeoning fashion label, Rama Voyage. The collection of dreamy, resort style linen separates are effortlessly wearable and evoke the very global, free spirited lifestyle you imagine her to have. “I want to set a really good example for my children. I want to work, I want things to be a success – I think it’s really important for them to see that. Having another child has definitely given me more courage to get things off the ground.” She has also recently taken on an ambassador role for Peanut, the app that’s just launched in Australia and designed to reflect modern motherhood. Described as ‘Tinder for mums’ it offers a smart, mobile solution to connect mothers during what can be an incredibly isolating experience. It’s a perfect fit for the busy mum, who credits Adam, her mum and support network in Bali as the ‘village’ helping to raise her tiny tribe in what’s been a hectic and intense few years. For now, the family are off on a new adventure together, heading to Europe and will spend time on a boat in Croatia. “Either the best or worst idea ever!” she laughs. With Lindy and Adam designing and building their new family home together and the older children happily attending Bali’s world renowned sustainability-focused Green School, it certainly seems that life really has begun at 40. Now armed with the emotional maturity to live her life with conviction, she’s learned to become more accepting of herself. “It has been difficult and there has been a big change in myself that I’ve noticed since turning 40 and having Goldie. I’ve found it’s better to concentrate on yourself and what your journey is. It’s been a really big lesson for me, but it’s been a really important one,” says Lindy. “I’m the happiest I’ve been in a long time – it shows through the children, it shows through me. It’s beautiful. There’s nothing really worrying or troubling me – I feel really content.” Lindy’s TIPS for travelling with children: – Always make sure all your kids devices are fully charged before leaving! I’ve been caught out on this one before, so now I also like to travel with a power bank too, which is especially handy for any long haul flights. Just make sure you charge that one before leaving too! – Ensure you have downloaded any movies, shows or games fully – not only so they can actually watch in flight, but to avoid any international data shock on your return. – On a long haul flight, I like to pack a surprise small gift I can whip out at some point on the flight when I feel tensions rise. Nothing big, and preferably something relevant to the trip, like a new diary, they can use for the holidays. That way I can encourage them to start on it straight away or distract them, even momentarily. – Always pack spare clothes for everyone on your carry-on. It’s especially true now with Goldie and the myriad of accidents that occur with a baby or toddler, but also if your luggage gets lost or, there are delays and you need to freshen up. – Kid

She was 65. I am 36. In the darkened hours of the night when sleep won’t find me, but tears in the shape and colour of my memories haunt me, I have trawled the internet for articles on how to somehow cope with this so physical a loss of the woman who shaped me. As it happens, there are a lot of women out there on the world wide webstergram who have lost their mums, and yet somehow this is no solace, because when it’s your mum… it’s different. The world is changed. Colour is somehow less vibrant. Laughter slightly more hollow. You keep on going, because you have to, because you too are a mum… and mums never stop being mums. Until all of a sudden, they’re gone. I’ve never been one for advice giving, in fact usually my only recommendation would be to “do the opposite of whatever it is that I decided to do” because mostly, my life decisions land me in awkward social situations, or my skirt flying up on a public road or being heavy-handedly escorted out of McDonalds. But all the articles I have read, written by other women who have lost their mums, were painted with the retrospect of a few months, years even. When people have managed to compose themselves slightly, when the edge of the loss has softened a little, when life has quietly returned and acceptance has been garnered, as much as one ever can. But as I sit here and write this, not quite a week has past since my mum left us, and my pain is still both expansive and suffocating. And, whilst it’s not much, this is what I can offer anyone who, one day, is looking for some midnight solace because all of a sudden they are rudderless in a world where once they were someone’s daughter, and now they are not. 1. Apparently “just fuck me up” is not a proper coffee order at McCafe. #whoknew  2. No one is going to know what to say to you. Because there is no right thing to say. Losing a mother is, broadly speaking, unfamiliar terrain to navigate for women our age, so very few people will be able to offer you anything but commonplace platitudes that won’t seem to scratch the surface of what lies beneath. The person saying them to you usually knows this. It’s just enough that they care and they are trying, because they love you. And it’s that love from those around you that will get you through this. At least that’s what I’m telling myself. For me at least, the first wrong thing anyone said, was to not say anything at all. 3. Strangely enough, there are actually a handful of other wrong things that people might unexpectedly say because, and this comes as no surprise to me, some people are assholes. I had people less than 24 hours after my mum passed asking me what was “going to happen to her body” and “will there be a coronial inquest” (she died of an illness she wasn’t thrown off a cliff). I understand that some people have practical and pragmatic brains. Generally speaking, I don’t like these people. Unfortunately, you can’t avoid everyone you don’t like. 4. When your mum dies, you feel like a child again, and simultaneously like the oldest version of yourself. 5. You just need to do whatever you need to do to keep yourself sane. For me, it’s been camping on the couch in the living room all night watching 90 Day Fiance on catch-up because it’s the only thing in those midnight hours that keeps my thoughts at bay. This may or may not involve double coated Tim Tams. 6. You’ll probably get angry at random stuff. I have found myself yelling at the car radio “I don’t want to listen to this fucking song!!!” which had precisely nothing to do with the program director at 107.1 and everything to do with the fact that I hate the world right now and if that leaves me feeling personally victimised by Post Malone, then so be it. 7. All of a sudden you are a member of a club you didn’t know existed and you never wanted to be a part of. No one’s lining up to be a member of the “lost my mum” club, let me tell ya. And yet somehow this sorority does offer an understanding that even your closest friends might not be able to offer you. And these people know that this pain just doesn’t go away in two weeks. These are the people I imagine myself calling on in a months time, or two months time, when the world has moved forward and I am still somehow struggling with my new reality. 8. You’ll look for signs that she’s still with you. Some days will bring them. Some days won’t. If you’re anything like me, you’ll cling on to every little breath of wind, or rustle in the leaves, or unexpected birdsong that might mean she’s watching over you and saying silently I still see you. I’m still here. 9. There will be gifts that this brings to your life. She will give you these things. Whether it’s that your brother and you will become closer because of it. Whether it’s that it solidifies the love you have for your step father. She will not leave this world for nothing, she will leave knowing these blessings will come in her wake, because she loves you and she’ll never stop making sure you know it. 10. If you have young kids, like I do, you won’t get to just… grieve. Because there are shoes to be put on and lunches to make. Sometimes these distractions will be merciful and other times you’ll wish for just a minute to cry without someone needing you to wipe their ass for them. 11. Your children’s grief will make your heart catch. When your

Jake Dean: A Word From Dad  Hello, winter you gorgeous thing. Log fires, red wine (me), puddle stomping (kid). Yes, ’tis the season for hibernating on the couch with the footy. But it’s also classic day-trip territory: when normally dusty paddocks turn lush green, and the steaming coffee and pasties of far-flung bakeries just somehow taste better. Get out there and explore our winter wonderland, folks – before climate change sees us in boardies year-round! READ: BOY SWALLOWS UNIVERSE – By Trent Dalton Boy Swallows Universe is the debut novel from one of Australia’s best longform nonfiction writers, the Weekend Australian’s Trent Dalton, and it’s a genre-bending doozy. At its heart it’s a coming-of-age tale/love story, told from the perspective of witty 1980s Brisbane teenager Eli Bell, who’s forced to navigate some truly gnarly obstacles when his dysfunctional family’s involvement with violent drug traffickers catches up with them. The ambitious novel is much more than a gritty yet heartwarming family drama/crime tale, exploring the legacy of domestic violence, drug abuse, alcoholism, fate, hope, redemption and even magic. It’s super funny and a genuine page-turner too, with its twists and turns more than making up for a few lengthy bits and occasional sappy dialogue. Read it to see one of Australia’s best writers at work in fiction for the first time. I’m amped to see what else he’s got in him. Available from Dymocks Hyde Park (from July), $32.99 I’M AUSTRALIAN TOO – By Mem Fox Mem Fox – what a lord! If you’re like me, you haven’t read her books for yonks, but little did you know she’s been churning out kids classics on the reg like some ageless, genius, book-machine this entire time! Her latest titled I’m Australian Too, features gorgeous illustrations by Ronojoy Ghosh and depicts different versions of modern Australian families (e.g. Aboriginal, English, Vietnamese, Somalian and Syrian). The final of the 13 snapshots, featuring a starry-eyed girl behind a grey wall and barbed wire, packs a message many more of our compatriots should heed. I hope this book finds its way into as many kids’ hands as possible. Much recommended. Available from Dymocks, Hyde Park $19.99 WATCH: Annihilation (2018) Annihilation is a straight-to-Netflix blockbuster starring the inimitable Natalie Portman as Lena, a former soldier turned cellular biology professor. The sci-fi thriller sinks its claws in from the opening scene, when a dude in a hazmat suit interrogates Lena about the whereabouts of her colleagues after a failed mission. What follows is a twisting tick-tock flashback of their expedition into an abnormal and growing electro-magnetic field that has descended on a patch of idyllic national park. If you like your endings wrapped up in a neat little package, this isn’t for you. While it’s not a perfect film, it is thought-provoking, tension-laden (think Apocalypse Now), beautifully shot and, perhaps best of all, features an all-women team of scientists kicking butt, which isn’t something we see enough of. DO: Whale-watching season. We really are spoilt brats here in SA, with our world-class wine regions, unparalleled beaches and such. Another super cool thing we have that I routinely forget about is gigantic whales, and there’s no better time to see ’em than now. Love is in the air (or water) from May-October when whales migrate to SA to mate, give birth and nurse their young, and Victor Harbor is a primo spot to see dozens of species (including the majestic Southern Right). The South Australian Whale Centre has a handy map of whale-watching hotspots and a live sightings log to aid your search, so pack the kids and some binoculars into the car post-haste! And if you really want to wow the fam with a fun fact, Google how much a Southern Right Whale’s testicle weighs… good God. sawhalecentre.com.au Follow Jake on: Twitter: @JakeJDean Instagram: @byjakedean Blog: jake-dean.com

The Second Six Months Any parent knows that the first year of a child’s life is incredibly challenging. It’s filled with so many ups and downs. There’s that first precious, gummy smile, or that first giggle, both of which make your heart feel like it might actually burst open with joy. Then there are the poo explosions, the cracked nipples and of course, the sleepless nights. And you experience a tiredness that you never, ever knew was humanly possible. Those first few months as you navigate your way through the newborn haze are demanding, absolutely. There’s a reason it’s been dubbed, The Fourth Trimester. Friends and family rally together to cook meals, to help with the cleaning and check in regularly to make sure Mum (and Dad) can devote all their time to nurturing this tiny new member of the family. ‘Sleep when the baby sleeps,’ we are told. ‘There’s no rush to lose the baby weight,’ we are reassured. As a society we put a lot of emphasis on the fragility and importance of those early months in the life of a New Baby and a New Mother and rightly so. But what about the months that are to follow? Fast forward to the second half of the year, when the meals have stopped coming, the visitors have died down and there is no one is offering to do your dishes or hang out your washing. You’ve officially dropped off the ‘new baby radar.’ For me personally, it’s this second half of my baby’s first year that I find the most difficult. My post-birth high has dissipated and I’m no longer running on adrenalin but rather a heady mix of caffeine and sheer exhaustion. There seems to be an unrealistic expectation floating around in mothering circles and baby sleep books that your child should be sleeping through the night by now. Not mine. Multiple feeds through the night are still the norm and the sleep deprivation has really started to take its toll. Breastfeeding is no longer a time for sleepy snuggles and Mama/Baby bonding, but rather an act of self-defence in which I try desperately to save my hair being pulled from its roots or my nose being ripped from my face. Nappy changes resemble a wrestling match, where my Son comes out a winner and I come out with shit on my hands. An active baby now means I can’t let him out of my sight for a second. Gone are the days where I would leave him in the middle of the bed while I made myself a cup of tea or had a quick shower. These little rituals of self-care are now reserved for nap times only. And my indoor plants and other precious household objects have had to be removed from baby ‘grab level’ lest he ends up with a fist full of soil in his mouth or drops a salt lamp on his tiny toes. Naturally, my house is in a constant state of disarray. My dining table is consistently covered in a mountain of clean washing, just waiting (praying) to be folded and put away. I spend 80% of my life doing dishes in a kitchen that is somehow never clean and my shower hasn’t been scrubbed in weeks. But amongst all of this chaos there is also a hell of a lot of love, so much learning and discovering and an overwhelming feeling of contentment that comes from becoming a Mother. My point however, is this: being a Mum to a baby under one is a tough gig. Regardless of whether you struggle through those early newborn days, the second six months or the whole damn year, it does get easier. So be kind to yourself. Ask for help if you need it. And pour yourself a glass of wine, Mama. You’re doing just fine. @dannii.odonnell

Mariana Mezic is one busy mama. Her instagram bio reads: ‘mama, artist, she-wolf and part time unicorn’. She divides her time between a farm and a beach house with her super squad – husband Matt and their four kids Kiki (15), Polly (13), Felix (6) and Gracie (3). If that isn’t busy enough, she’s also responsible for three dogs, three cats and four horses. Oh, and she’s the talented artist behind the Adelaide Cabaret Festival’s 2018 artwork. “The struggle is real at this end,” Mariana laughs. “Matt copes with the chaos far better then I do, he keeps a level head, I let my hot European blood takeover a lot!” Coming from a large Croatian household, Mariana is all too familiar with chaotic and loud families. But when she fell pregnant at 30 with her first born, Kiki, the idea of parenting, or even having a big family, wasn’t something she had planned. “It was a happy possibility of perhaps ‘one day’ in my head. Then as the first two got older, the idea of a bustling household really appealed to me. When we moved to the hills we had two more because well, farm fresh air and no TV,” she laughs. It wasn’t long after the first two kids that Mariana started feeling the mum pressures of having it ‘all together’. However, over the 12-year age gap between the younger kids, she noticed the parenting landscape change. “I feel I can be more honest and open about the struggles of motherhood now. Nobody was talking about that back then. I felt very alone, very isolated and no voice to be honest about how hard it all was,” she admits. “The climate is different these days. People are encouraged to openly discuss the trials and tribulations of parenthood. I mean, motherhood is a sloppy, icky, drippy, sleep-deprived mess of emotions and struggles – and the most beautiful, heavenly, heart-bursting, stunning journey you’ll undertake.” And yes, the juggle is real. “It’s a constant juggle!” she exclaims. “One minute you’re dealing with teenage dilemmas and dramas and the next, the 3 year old has lobbed a block at her brother’s head.” “Dealing with a toddler and the constant demanding nature of them is polar opposites to dealing with the teens who go into themselves and become somewhat aloof. They do the eye rolling, suddenly have opinions and know it all.” In the spirit of juggling – and what mums do best – Mariana turns to her happy place – her art. It’s a talent that gives her energy to be a stronger, happier woman, and often represents where she’s at in her life. “It’s messy, it’s colourful, it’s crazy and intense. When I turn up to a white piece of paper, I’m not a mum or wife. I’m back to just me and I’ve found that so important to bring that back to mum life.” Inspired by life events, her artwork features fierce women as the hero – someone Mariana aspired to be. And something the Adelaide Cabaret Festival had their eye on. “The divine Ali McGregor (director of Cabaret festival) found my work on Instagram. Her theme for the festival was eyes open, and when you view my work the eyes are the first thing that grab you,” she explains. “She kindly asked if I’d be up for doing a painting for them and I screamed YES! To go from hanging up loads of washing to presenting my work to a whole city is an absolute thrill to say the least.” Between the kids, farm and her artwork, it’s easy to think Mariana ‘does it all’. But she’s quick to shut down that notion. “Ha! By no means do I do it all. Something always suffers. Sometimes my motherhood suffers and I’m not nearly as present as I need to be and mother guilt kicks in. Sometimes my art suffers when I dive into motherhood and feel the pressure to be one of these baking/knitting/active supermums who have it all running smoothly. I struggle with balance and perhaps I always will.” “The only thing we have here in spades is love for each other and that’s the only thing I will go into battle for, the rest is all a sloppy mess and I’m actually ok with that.” @marianamezic_artist marianamezic.com Images by Meaghan Coles Photography 

As a successful entrepreneur, lifestyle blogger, brand ambassador, television and radio host and mother of four children, one could be forgiven for wondering how Bec Judd could possibly find time to do more. On top of all that, Bec has recently launched her first book, The Baby Bible – the ultimate baby book for modern mums. How did you come about writing The Baby Bible? Writing a book is something that was always a distant goal. I didn’t know what I wanted to write about, but I’d always thought I’d love to write a book one day. Publishing the blog, I cover so many lifestyle areas, from fashion, beauty and food, to interiors and events. When I ended up having four children and started writing more about baby routines and feeding, I thought “this is my jam now, I know what I’m doing.” I don’t think you can quite write a book after you’ve had two babies, but after I had four I knew I was well qualified! Tell us a bit about the book and how new and pregnant mums can benefit from it? With a name like ‘The Baby Bible’, we really had to encompass the entire pregnancy and newborn baby journey. It’s a month by month guide, but it has my personal story interwoven into the months. My entire medical team have also contributed so it covers all the professional advice, as well as my story and lifestyle elements like recipes, lists and routines. It really is, I think, everything from the entire journey and I’ve told it in a very raw, honest, funny way that I think has been missing in baby books gone by. I wanted people to be able to really connect with my journey and relate it to theirs. How important was your dream team of medical experts in your pregnancies? So important! They were the team through all three of my pregnancies and I was very lucky to have them. Dr Len Kliman is one of the best obstetricians in the country and Dr Andrew Ngu is the global head of fetal ultrasound, so I was in the best hands. I’m a mad researcher so I researched a lot to find out what was happening with my body and how people could help me. As well as what was happening with the babies from a sleep-science perspective and who was the best person to see. Oscar was a terrible sleeper and when he was six weeks old I was at breaking point. That’s when I realised how important it was to outsource to professionals if you don’t know what you’re doing. “It’s okay to say I’m not super mum and I can’t do this all by myself because if I do, I’m going to have a nervous breakdown.” Reading The Baby Bible feels like sitting down and chatting with a brutally honest friend about pregnancy and babies. Is that the tone you were hoping to achieve? I wanted to have a tone throughout the book of women supporting each other. Don’t compare your baby to others or your routine to others, just pick and choose what you need and adapt it to your baby. I want mums to read it and go “it’s ok if I did it like this, but my mum or girlfriend did it like this” just to stop the judgement, comparison and guilt. The tone of the book in that way was very considered. Are you a naturally organised person? Has having kids changed this? I always used to be the one who would text or email back straight away, return calls, and never, ever, be late. Now I’m always the last-minute canceller, 15-20 minutes late to everything, never get back to my friends. It’s completely changed me. I prioritise my children and they work to their own schedule so it’s been a big shock actually. I’m not used to always apologising, but I’m just in a different part of my life and you’ve got to prioritise your family. Can you tell us some of the things you try to make time for in terms of fitness, beauty, food and wellness? I try to make those things fit in over a week. If I have a crazy work schedule and I barely see my kids, the next day I will try to schedule in a day with them. I do cardio tennis on a Tuesday morning; Wednesday Chris and I do date night, so we have a babysitter and we’ll either play tennis, watch a movie or do dinner. Throughout the week, I try and get that balance right and it’s been engineered over time, I haven’t always been good at it but I feel like I’m at a good place now. Can you share with any final words of wisdom for new mums? Just enjoy the ride. Everyone says this and I know it’s cliché, but they do grow up so fast. Even when you’re going through a bad patch and are kind of hating on life, just know that it doesn’t last forever. “I remember when Oscar was a newborn thinking I hate this, this is never going to end, I’ve ruined my life” and that only feels like yesterday and now he’s about to turn seven. So just know that it doesn’t last forever and you will get through it. This is just a taste of all the wisdom within The Baby Bible and it’s such a relatable read from someone who is a hands-on mum who keeps it real and after birthing four babies, clearly has experience up her sleeve which she wants to share to remind all mamas that we’re in this together. It’s clear that Bec is driven, ambitious and family oriented, and that she has experienced so much of what motherhood can throw at you. A woman of many talents, she can now add published author to her expansive list of career accomplishments. Without doubt, however, her greatest achievements to date are her beautiful

Leadership Qualities At a recent parent/teacher interview for our teenager, one of her teachers told us she had leadership potential. This was not news to me. Not because I am one of those parents who blindly believes my children to be naturally superior, but simply because, as the eldest of three girls, Grace has no choice but to be a leader. Leadership had been thrust upon her from a tender age. The braider of her little sisters’ hair, DJ in charge of family playlists, hand-holder across busy roads and fall-back babysitter. But, it was what the teacher said next that left me slightly taken aback. He said he was making sure he gave her extra encouragement. To be a leader. Because she’s a GIRL. And girls are often reluctant to take on this role. I shifted in my already uncomfortable plastic seat. I wanted to get all up in his grill Oprah-at-the-Golden-Globes style and point out that in my girl-dominated household (at least my husband has a boy dog to hang with) my daughters were crystal clear who run the world, if running the world did indeed turn out to be their career path of choice. But then I remembered some sobering observations from Lean In, Sheryl Sandberg’s book on women and leadership, and I bit my tongue. She reports that: “Women only apply for jobs if they think they meet 100% of the criteria, for men that figure is 60%.” Women are also less likely to actively seek promotions, believing that if they work hard enough, recognition will eventually come their way. “Were you trying for a boy?” I was asked on an almost daily basis when I announced my third pregnancy after two girls. Nope. At the risk of an overshare, I was trying not to have any more children. (Sorry Frankie, we wouldn’t send you back) When another pink one emerged in the delivery room the following thoughts went through my mind: The gas is wearing off and that really stung. Really. Stung. (There were a few swear words in there too, let’s be honest) Look at this perfect little human. Another girl. That will save money on clothes / shoes / toys. Another girl. I will never get into the bathroom. I wonder how long I can stay in hospital, have someone bring me meals and ask me how I’m feeling mentally and physically on a scale of 1 to 10, and take the baby when she cries. The following thoughts did NOT go through my mind: I wish she was a boy. I hope she can still be a leader despite her obvious gender deficiency. Girls are going to be ok. This year, for the first time on record, more women than men were appointed to the boards of Australia’s top 200 companies. The UK has a female leader, as does Germany, and New Zealand’s Prime Minister is going to become a mother soon which will make running a country seem like a big ol’ piece of cake. Girls can now play, not only netball, but footy and cricket at a professional level in front of big crowds and big television audiences. Girls can harness a worldwide moment to stop sexual exploitation. But there is still progress to be made. Begrudgingly, I accept that Grace’s teacher’s endeavours to identify and promote future female leaders are still required and should be applauded. I only hope that in the not too distant future it won’t be necessary. @rebeccamorse10

A Letter to My Second Born Dear Baby Boy, From the moment I found out you were in my belly, things were already so different. When I was pregnant with your Big Sister, I was blissfully unaware of just how much my life was about to change. I bobbed around naively in my first pregnancy bubble, spending hours saving nursery ideas to Pinterest boards and giddily discussing baby names with your Dad. I bought teeny, tiny onesies and organised them in drawers by size and colour. And I lay in bed every night, dreaming of what it would be like to be a Mum. I’m sorry to say that when it came to your turn, there was one very big difference, taking the shape of one very small person. Yes, your Big Sister popped that blissful, early pregnancy bubble, quick smart. Being pregnant with a toddler is no joke. As if the nausea, the exhaustion and the insufferable need to pee every hour wasn’t bad enough, I was also at the mercy of a demanding, emotionally unstable, nap refusing, dictator. There were no weekly photos documenting your growing bump (too exhausted!) and no new outfits to gush over (hello pumpkin stained, hand-me-downs!). And I didn’t impeccably plan out your nursery. We lived in a two bedroom unit; you had a modest nook in a corner of our bedroom with just your bassinet and a simple mobile made of sea shells. Your Dad emptied out a drawer for you from his dresser and we placed your change mat on top. Pregnancy aside, when you did finally arrive (and in a much quicker fashion than your Sister) it all felt new to me again. As your naked, wrinkled body was thrust against my skin for the first time, it was as if my heart might just swell so big it would burst straight out of my chest. I want you to know that this moment is not up for comparison with that of your Sister’s. They were equally wonderful. Equally life-altering. But this was Our moment, never to be replicated. Fast-forward to our return home and there were no early morning, snuggly breastfeeds in bed as we drifted in and out of sleep. No, you were fed and strapped into the baby carrier by 7am, just in time for your Sister to wake up, so I could take part in bleary-eyed, breakfast negotiations with my hands free. There were no impromptu photo sessions with multiple outfit changes on the living room floor; I was too busy getting your Big Sister a snack every damn second of the day. And there was absolutely no drinking of the decaf as we navigated our way through the early days and weeks of breastfeeding. It was full throttle on the caffeine so I could do. All. The. Things. You had coffee pumping through your veins from day one, I’m sorry about that. Your naps are a mess thanks to your Big Sister’s social schedule, and your first food wasn’t organic banana and avocado puree. I get pangs of guilt thinking about your baby book which lies unopened in the linen closet (I’ll fill it in by the time you turn one, I promise), or your keepsake box containing only your hospital name bracelet, that sits next to your Sister’s, overflowing with mementos. But now, at almost eight months old, as we approach your first birthday (which is sure to be underwhelming), I’ve had a realisation: it doesn’t matter, all these things I haven’t done for you. These material things don’t matter at all. The guilt I’ve been holding on to, is gone. Because what matters, is how I love you. And believe me, baby boy. Just like your Big Sister, you are so, very loved. Mum. @dannii.odonnell

New Mum friends At the risk of sounding like a socially inept weirdo, I have come to the conclusion that making New Mum Friends is a very awkward business. Unless you have been lucky enough to have babies around the very same time as your besties, chances are you may be in the market for some like-minded, new friends with kids similar in age to yours and who hold similar belief systems surrounding coffee consumption, The Kardashians (it’s a no from me) and parenting styles. It’s not to say that your existing friends aren’t important, because they are, so very important. It’s just that you may be on a slightly different journey to them at this point in time and there are gaps that could be filled by finding some New Mum Friends. A lot of first time Mums, me included, join a Mothers’ Group after the birth of their baby. The trouble with Mothers’ Groups is that the only thing you generally have in common with these women, as lovely as they all are, is that you all just had a baby. Sure, there will often be some extra-curricular group catch ups to start off with, but they usually fizzle out within a few months and everyone has happily gone their separate ways by your babies’ first birthdays. Some Mums I know have been lucky enough to make life-long friends in one of these groups, but they seem to be the rare exception to the rule. If only we could join a Mothers’ Group based on our own interests outside of being Mums, now that would be a New Mum Friend, smorgasbord! Playgroup, kinder-gym and the playground are all the perfect breeding grounds for auditioning potential New Mum Friends. We politely small talk with lots of different Mums (and Dads) as our kids float around like the social butterflies they are, jumping on the trampoline with this kid and blowing bubbles with that kid. But every now and then, ‘ding, ding,’ you start talking to someone that you seem to have a lot in common with and as an added bonus, your kids get on well too. There’s that Mum at kinder-gym, with the sweet daughter and the chill vibes. Or that Mum at the park, with two kids under three that says she likes to drink gin and just so happens to live around the corner from you. And then there’s that new Mum at Playgroup, with the slightly dishevelled hair, who’s also just had her second baby and politely laughs at your sleep deprivation-induced mutterings: all excellent candidates for ‘New Mum Friends.’ So why, when it comes to the crunch of ‘let’s swap numbers’ or ‘I’ll find you on Facebook’ do we (I) feel like such self-conscious, over-friendly, creeps? Personally, if roles were reversed and a like-minded Mum suggested a play date over coffee, I would happily agree to it and not think twice. So I’m not sure why I am hesitant to do the same. Maybe in part, it’s simply because I am out of practice. Prior to having babies, you have such a stable group of friends, some of whom you may have known since early school days, that you’re just so comfortable and not really in the market for ‘new’ ones. But as we know, Motherhood loves to challenge every aspect of our lives and why shouldn’t our social skills be one of them? So, next time you find yourself in one of these situations, crushing hard on a potential New Mum Friend – just take the leap! Ask for her number! She’s probably thinking the exact same thing as you and doesn’t want to come across as the self-conscious, over-friendly, creep I mentioned earlier. There is no doubt that if you can manage to break through the awkwardness and find yourself a New Mum Friend, it will absolutely be worth it. To be able to laugh and cry and drink lattes together through the wonder weeks and the temper tantrums and the toilet training mishaps, knowing they ‘get it,’ like ‘really get it?’ That New Mum Friend simply becomes, Your Friend. And she will be a friend for life. @dannii.odonnell

Dad Words I’m beginning to realise two things with these reviews. One, is I pretty much smash ’em all out with a glass of shiraz next to my laptop, mere hours from deadline after my boy’s gone to sleep. And two, man, I’m no longer any good at keeping up with new releases. So, my apologies for constantly being a tad behind, but since this is a parenting mag I’m just going to assume you’re no longer up-to-speed with… well, basically anything either, am I right? READ: BETWEEN A WOLF AND A DOGWRITTEN BY GEORGIA BLAINGeorgia Blain’s Between a Wolf and a Dog charts the ups, downs, chequered past and uncertain future of a Sydney family, with the story mostly spanning a single rainy day. It tackles all the big stuff – broken marriage, infidelity, death, memory, parenthood, forgiveness, our relationship with art – but it’s written with a deft and tender touch. Look, if you’re more into explosions this probably isn’t for you, but it’s hard not to relate to each of the book’s complex characters and it’ll leave you reflecting on your own failings and hopes long after the final page.Dymocks, $29.99 THE CITY CHILD’S NATURE BOOKWRITTEN BY GILLIAN HENRIQUESFor the small person(s) in your life, I’m going right back to 1944 (taking my lack of being up-to-speed to comical levels here) with an absolute gem called The City Child’s Nature Book. Designed to inspire wonder in city-bound Aussie kids about the natural world around them (perhaps even more relevant now in the smartphone age), it features gorgeous illustrations of common sights such as spiders, pigeons, mice and gumnuts, alongside charming descriptions that illuminate what makes them special. We were lucky enough to grab a copy from my grandma, but there are still dog-eared copies floating around online if you search hard enough. WATCH: Now, I was going to head to the cinemas to review Black Panther, I swear, but then parenting got in the way and all I did was watch Netflix with popcorn crumbs coating my belly. If you haven’t binged US family drama-thriller Bloodline yet (it finished last year), it’s well worth your time. Charting the fortunes of the wealthy Rayburn family in the picture postcard Florida Keys, the series peels back their layers, revealing dark secrets before a gnarly chain of events changes them all forever. At the crux of the show is the duelling tension and love between the flawed Atticus Finch-like cop, John Rayburn, and his perennial delinquent older brother Danny (played impeccably by one of Australia’s greats, Ben Mendelsohn). Netflix.com DO: Lions 360, Monarto Zoo. Have you seen this? Are you kidding me?! My 11-month-old’s still probably a tad young to appreciate being in a cage within clawing range of one of Australia’s largest lion prides, but you better believe it’s on my hit-list when he’s old enough. Monarto cut the ribbon on the hair-raising attraction late last year and it’s not just an impressive adrenaline hit – price of admission helps the Zoo raise awareness for the vulnerable species and contributes to the international breeding program that aims to safeguard them from extinction. monartozoo.com.au/lions360 Jake Dean is a writer, surfer and bibliophile who’s counting down the days to take his eleven-month-old, Koa, for his first wave. Follow him on: Twitter: @JakeJDean Instagram: @byjakedean Blog: jake-dean.com

Even if you’re not familiar with the name, Billie Justice Thomson yet, there’s every chance you’ve admired her work. It might be her sign writing and iconic food imagery painted on a shop window, or her joyfully unpretentious illustrations in print. Deceptively simple and laced with humour, Billie’s distinctive style has a nostalgic, kitschy appeal and is both a celebration and documentation of the every day. Now based in Adelaide after a stint in Melbourne, Billie originally studied Visual Art at the University of South Australia. While the move east paid off, with her career growing relatively quickly and very organically, Billie was drawn back home for a quieter life after six years. “I felt like it was an easy decision in the end,” she says. “The reasons I left Adelaide were the same reasons I came back,” she reflects. Speaking from her Thebarton studio, the move proved serendipitous; meeting her partner and then welcoming a cheeky baby boy, Marvin, nearly a year ago. “I always knew I wanted to be a mother. Of course I was appropriately nervous in the lead up to his birth, but it felt really natural and special and I didn’t think that being a mum would be this much fun,” she says. Juggling a thriving art practice with the demands of parenthood comes instinctively to Billie. While her partner shares the load equally, motherhood has made her “much more efficient”! It’s a skill that will stand her in good stead given her client list already spans the likes of liquor behemoth Dan Murphy’s, to iconic Australian fashion brand, Gorman. A recent series of commissions for Gourmet Traveller is especially important to Billie. They represent a career-long ambition to collaborate with the pre-eminent foodie bible and one that came post-baby after moving back to Adelaide – two life events she felt could potentially hold her back professionally.   With a number of varying and exciting projects in the pipeline, other key commissions are on the cusp of fruition; most notably as one of Australia’s leading artists featured in the Qantas Curates initiative. Her quirky Fairy Bread illustration will adorn the amenity kits for Qantas business class on international flights. “[It’s an] art exhibition at 38,000 feet!” she says. In keeping with unusual gallery spaces, her most recent exhibition to date, Home Paintings was shown at her local pub, The Wheatsheaf Hotel. The highly personal and witty domestic paintings reflect what Billie describes as a kind of ‘manic nesting’ period before Marvin’s arrival. “I was nervous and be too tired to paint,” she says, “Home Paintings felt like a last-ditch effort to get as much work done as possible, and it was only when I stood back that I realised how home-centric the paintings were,” she says. In a case of art imitating life, the themes of homeliness, comfort and domesticity that thread throughout her body of work have spilled out into her actual art practice. Her first at-home studio enables her to make time for painting without compromising time with Marvin. “My world feels like it has shrunk and in the past I wouldn’t have liked it, but now I love it,” she says of working from home. A subtle shift in what motivates and inspires her as an artist has been a happy side-effect of motherhood too. “It’s for Marvin,” she says. “He makes me want to work harder and to make sure I do what I love.” billiejusticethomson.com @billiejusticethomson Meaghan Coles Photography